[D3, LE, Training Grounds] Priorities

[Kuni Mitsuko]

If it's possible, the Crab's eyes are wider than before.

"You... So... I..." If it's possible for a person to drown in a tidal wave of words, that's what is happening before Haru's eyes.

"But you... I mean. I don't... I'm not..." Without realizing it, the young Kuni picks up her bokken again and is holding near each end, with the bokken across her knees.

It takes a little time before she composes her thoughts enough to say, not very convincingly, "I don't... I'm not... here, thinking, about any of that."

[Shiba Haru]

"It seems pretty clear to me that you are. Nothing wrong with it either, you already know what your duty will be for the most part so after this week marriage is the next big thing in your life; in all our lives.

She is very sweet after all and I feel like I have a lot in common with her so I get it. My hang-up is the age difference, it's hard not to see her as a little sister since she could be. Where as you seem to be more of an age with me and you remind me a lot of someone I know and had a crush on as a kid.

But it's all just thoughts, I don't think any of us are improper enough to do anything about it.

Right?"

[Kuni Mitsuko]

Mitsuko keeps her eyes closed, shaking her head back and forth as Haru tells her more. At mention of a former crush she raises the bokken and presses the flat of it against her forehead, like a ward against bad dreams.

"You... Shiba-san, it's... This is all too much. You're not wrong, about some of what you're saying, but..." The bokken dips and she shakes her head again. "This... I don't... I can't be thinking about such things. This is... The Topaz is a great honor! I should focus. This all... What you're saying..." Mitsuko seems caught in a whirlpool of thoughts she's ill-prepared for.

[Shiba Haru]

"I am sorry Mitsuko-san you are right. I have been distracted by these thoughts and now I am distracting you with them and it is unfair to do so."

There was genuine disappointment in himself in his words. He retrieved a bokken and moved to stand near her.

"This will be good for both of us I think, a learning moment. Take your stance if you will."

Haru adjusted his footing but did not fully commit to a stance, waiting to see if the Kuni would take the opportunity to clear her mind with combat.

[Kuni Mitsuko]

Mitsuko shakes her head a few more times, then sets the bokken down beside her. She looks up at Haru, clearly tired, but also curious.

"Shiba-san," she begins slowly. "You... clearly know some things about... some things. And there... When we're done here, the focus will be on... betrothals..." The Crab takes a deep breath. "Perhaps... You could sit and we will talk for a time?" The invitation is sincere, though it's also fairly clear she has reservations about it.

[Shiba Haru]

Haru didn't hesitate to sit down beside her. The Kuni's odd behavior had burned away any amusement he had been feeling. Now he just felt ashamed and a bit concerned for Mitzuko.

"Certainly Mitsuko-san, I would be happy to discuss things with you. You should feel safe to speak with you heart or your mind. What would you like to discuss?"

[Kuni Mitsuko]

At first the Kuni simply nods silently, but after a few moments she focuses on Haru and begins to speak.

"You... Have talked to several people, but you've also got... feelings," Mitsuko says the word like others would name a type of oni. "So how... What does one do when they, um, look at Rin-san like you do?"

[Shiba Haru]

"Well there are a lot of things someone could do. The most direct thing would be to just come out and tell her. Some might be to shy or embarrassed to do that and it is the riskiest way of going about it but it gets it out there the quickest and just saying the words can be a big relief no matter what the outcome is. Some times you just need to get it out of you."

He rubbed his left wrist as he spoke.

"A better approach may be to just spend as much time with her as one can, take the time to make sure the feelings are real and not just momentary and it lets you try to figure out if she feels the same way. That can be tricky if you aren't very perceptive though, you might perceive things that aren't really there or miss hints entirely."

He looked at her and smiled warmly.

"This is one of those cases where a safe middle ground, spend a lot of time with her and drop little hints along the way and then see how she reacts. If it goes well fantastic but if it doesn't you can just play it off like you were joking around."

He cleared his throat.

"This is all based on my long history of talking to girls mind you. As you can tell I am expert on the subject. So uh...you prefer a mirror then?"

[Kuni Mitsuko]

Mitsuko sits steadily, nodding thoughtfully as she absorbs Haru's thoughts. When he gets to his question, though, she freezes.

"I, um... I don't..." She looks very attentively at the ground in front of her. "I've never... Um..." She pauses. "Back home, everyone is family, or a soldier I might command. I've never thought..." She pauses even longer. "People here are... Different." She remains intensely focused on the ground, although Haru can probably sense that she has a lot of energy spinning in her despite sitting pretty still.

[Shiba Haru]

"Neither have I, I'd wager most of here haven't but the thought or desire is natural. But we have to remember that this is a brief moment in our lives, sadly most of us will never see each other again after we leave here. That can be a sad thought if you believe you have found your One or it can spur you action; making the most of time and opportunity you have left.

The question you have to ask yourself is what are you looking for? It isn't an easy question but one I have known the answer to for myself for a long time and that is inner strength, something I see in you and Rin-san in abundance. So what is it you see in her?

If no one has told you, things such as mirrors ARE allowed though it can be a tricky to arrange it is possible."

Haru began to crush his own desire deep within him, he would rather keep the two samurai-ko as friends than do anything to anger or hurt one of them. The sadness never reached his voice but was in his eyes and he was thankful the Kuni wasn't looking at him.

[Kuni Mitsuko]

"You, um... You're wise, like your brother, but also different from him..." There's a pause as Mitsuko seems to battle over whether she'll say more or not.

"Rin-san is strong, you're right. Such a warm spirit. And she..." The Crab blushes, invisibly in this light, and she clutches her hands in her lap tightly, almost like she's hurt.

"Um," she stammers, redirecting. "Um, uh, you... Inner strength isn't me," she admits. "I don't... I have no idea what I'm doing here."

[Shiba Haru]

"You're here for the same reason Rin-san is, that all of us are, because you clan knows you are meant for greatness. You are here because you are among the most promising young samurai in the entire empire and they aren't wrong, I could tell that from our first meeting. Self doubt doesn't change the fact that you are strong of mind, body and spirit if you weren't you never would have been sent to a school for leaders. You aren't at all like i imagined a Kuni to be like and if anything this shy uncertainty makes me envy Rin-san even more."

The sadness was gone from his eyes and he looked at her with the warmest smile imaginable.

Hopefully someone will get all bashful over me. Hopefully this doesn't end up too painful for her.

[Kuni Mitsuko]

"You... Shiba-san, how are you so confident in these things you say..." Mitsuko shakes her head, then stops to look at Haru in the low light. She's not arguing, really, but is struggling.

[Shiba Haru]

"Because I have been filled with doubts ever since arriving here. My performance in these tests has been average at best. I can't stop thinking about my future after this event is over and I am incredibly distracted by all the amazing and beautiful women I have met here."

If this were one of his pillow books this would be the part where he brushes the hair away from her face but he didn't, she didn't seem ready for that and he wasn't the one she wanted to be doing it.

"It's a comfort to know I'm not the only one and I would share with you the same wisdom that was shared with me. Feeling inadequate when surrounded by the empires greatest is natural, but don't ever forget that the reason you are among the greats is because you ARE one of the greats. You may not see it in yourself at times but others do. I certainly do and I'm sure Rin-san does as well."

I'm gonna need a drink after this.

[Kuni Mitsuko]

"Shiba-san, what..." Mitsuko puts a hand to her head. "How do you even... Know..." She puts her hand down and looks at Haru intensely. "If we're all special, if any one of us... Maybe it's not her, or... Or maybe it's not me... And, I mean, maybe..." The Kuni's eyes flicker between the ground and the Phoenix.

[Shiba Haru]

Haru was confused by her unfinished thoughts.

"Uncertainty is natural but the swiftest way out of it is to act. Whatever is confusing you right now, whatever it is you are struggling to give voice just act on it, do something and clarity will come. Do nothing and the uncertainty will remain."

[Kuni Mitsuko]

Mitsuko grits her teeth in the face of his serenity, then loses her control.

"I do not even know how to act," she says angrily, eyes narrowed. "I have studied everything, prepared for battle and everything else with studiousness that even other Kuni find frightful, and yet I can't even..." She waves her hands in frustration. "What do I even call this?" She asks in exasperation. "My parents tell me nothing, I know nothing, and then I come here and... And... What am I supposed to do?"

[Shiba Haru]

"I'm no serene, I'm wishing I had some sake right now, but my concern for you is greater than my own despair. Sounds an awful lot like the word your looking for is LOVE. No, they don't train us for that, there is no training to be had. What you do now, where things go from here is up to you to decide. So here is my advice, tell her how you feel, it may not end the way you want but I do think she will try to hurt you. But remember, and this is very important, this is only a week. After this we will all go our separate ways and may never see each other again. That will hurt, so I say make the most of this week while you can. Travel back with her if you can, write each other, we both want to become penpals with you already. Be vulnerable with her, as you are with me now."

Tonight is going to suck so much.

[Kuni Mitsuko]

"No, no this is..." Mitsuko pauses in frustration. "I don't know what, but it can't be that!" She glares a challenge at Haru fora moment, then takes a heavy breath.

"We're friends," she says forcefully. "I have... friendly feelings for Rin-san, but also Kasumi-san, and you, your brother and Kiriko-san..." She's clearly trying to put things into a frame of understanding that she just doesn't have, like she's never had a real friend, let alone a romantic feeling.

[Shiba Haru]

"Thank you." He said warmly. "I am honored you would call me your friend and consider you my friend. It sounds like you've made many friends here already and it's only been a few days. You're going to be awfully busy reading and replying to all the letters your going to get from everyone."

What in jigoku... does she not have any friends? I am so confused.