(D9, EM, Jiro's room) Stretching Wings

[Isawa Natsuko]

Natsuko scratches at the door, a large-ish, cloth-wrapped bundle in her other hand, steam escaping from the space between gathered corners, dampening the fabric. Simple slippers and and what looks like her simple orange kimono worn over the heavier traveling clothing spoke to the morning chill.

[Shiba Jiro]

Jiro moves to the door and slides it open a very small way. Seeing Natsuko, he opens it the rest and lets her in before closing it behind her. He had his sleeping yukata still on and his blanket draped over his shoulders.

"Good morning, Natsuko-san," he smiles brightly to her before offering a place at the tiny table he had been making origami at, a sweep of his arm clearing them away so she can set down her parcel. He goes about picking up the little animals and shapes, to set them somewhere more appropriate.

"Thank you. I really do appreciate it. You don't need to do things like this for me, so it is lovely that you have... truly."

[Isawa Natsuko]

She shuffles in, setting the bundle on the table and beginning to unwrap the small stack of packed bento boxes. "I am...trying to learn the more active principles embodied in your carving. Also, I think the kitchen is already in full gear for tonight's feast. This is a breakfast to readily chase some chill away."

The scent rising from the boxes is savory with a hint of green from the early spring peas.

[Shiba Jiro]

"It smells nice," he says, catching the scent as he picks up the paper creations, before setting them aside near his bedding.

When he returns to the table he looks at it and sighs, thinking for a moment. Then decides to sit down diagonal to her rather than across from.

"We're almost finished here. When we travel back, well, where I am from is near the Imperial border. I don't know if your sensei would mind, but I would like you to travel with me to my home, then secure permission to escort you back to your school. I don't know if I wouldn't be granted entrance as a visitor, but I imagine there must be a town surrounding or near to it where I could wait or meet with those in charge of your training and well being. I suspect that the decision for the betrothal was made by someone on the Isawa side of things."

[Isawa Natsuko]

She continues setting out the soup, rice, and emerald green tea. "Given the lines of power, I very much assumed it was the Isawa who put forward the match. I could write for such permissions, and hopefully receive a response as we travel." Dropping unceremoniously to kneel on one of the thic cushions, she holds her sleeve out of the way as she plucks lids from bowls. "Why do you wish those arrangements? I have no objections, but find myself curious."

[Shiba Jiro]

He smiles gently as he watches her go about the preparations. Settling into the spot to her left, he gets comfortable with the blanket draped over his shoulders.

"I would like for you to meet your new family, and I would also like to meet the sensei and students you have been with for so long," he replies. "And... I would like to minimize the time that we are apart as well. Being emotionally and intellectually closer is encouraged by physically being near to each other, I think."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"Ah. I had some idea that all would meet at some point, but had not thought about it much." She pauses, reaching for the steaming bowl. "I suppose if I had thought about it, I would have expected the nakodo to plan meetings." Her hands wrap around the bowl, grateful for the warmth. "I will write today for permission."

She pauses a moment, sips the warm broth, then delays action only one breath more. "I have thought a while, and am trying to find my way into those yang principles that fit, so I wish to ask. What drew you? To have feelings strong enough to pursue?" Her voice is as level as always, expression clear and apparently untroubled as she asks.

[Shiba Jiro]

The question draws a tightness to his chest. But he had promised honesty and had no intention of going back on it. He slowly takes a bowl for himself and stares at it.

"She... understands parts of life that is not normal for samurai to understand. We both have experience with physical work, but not martial focused. We both are pretty straightforward and purposeful with our words when relaxed. I think it was simply a pair of personalities that happened to fit well together. She liked my court training, I liked her bluntness. And it built towards something inappropriate very quickly."

Looking up from the bowl, "There are traits that I find similar in both of you. Some things about you that are more appealing. You are just as straightforward with your words. But you also have an appreciation for theological subjects that she doesn't and I do. I avoided talking about such things with her, but that's not something we need to avoid."

[Isawa Natsuko]

She nods, reaching for chopsticks to pluck spring peas from her soup, carefully selecting and eating three before speaking again. "I am not in search of comparison so much as understanding who you are." As he said, she tends to be straightforward with her words. "You and I understand things that are not normal to most samurai, but they are a very different sort of not normal. But that understanding of base labor is important to you. Ebisu appreciates his devotees as much as Fukurokujin does."

"What are your family's lands like?"

[Shiba Jiro]

"I'm sorry. I compared because I was feeling defensive. Which I should not. You have been only curious and understanding with me. And I appreciate that. And as it seems to me a natural thing for you, it's another that I appreciate about you."

Also taking up chopsticks, he os far less calculating and selective. He is careful and proper, but doesn't seem to worry much about the different food options.

"Our lands? Well, there's the small home and bit of yard in near Zumiki-Mihari. It's a smaller village that doesn't have a name really. It's simply referred to as part of Zumiki-Mihari, never differentiated by outsiders. There are a few samurai families there, but it's mostly heimin working to support the tower. Very quiet and peaceful. I'm not exactly sure what the tower is used for other than watching the border, but it must be something since we are told not to discuss anything about it."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"No apology necessary, Jiro-san." she says quietly, lifting her tea. "It was only informational. I do not seek to..." she hunts for words a moment, "to gather compliments or seek to meet another standard." Her eyes lift to his. "To slip into the Void, one needs to know oneself, honestly, to avoid fraying away into all the possible versions of that self. I am secure."

The tea is a sharp, seaweedy contrast to the rich broth as she listens to his description of his home. "Not so far from Nikesake, yes?" Seems odd to have a tower you are not to discuss," she pauses a moment, "but are discussing..."

"I suppose we would be living there? I imagine it is not so forested, if there is a watchtower."

[Shiba Jiro]

"Ahh, not to discuss anything about the mission. The physical tower and surroundings can be seen easily from the border with how close it is. There is no point in trying to hide its physical characteristics or the landscape it resides in. And there are not many trees in the immediate area, but there are some forest lands not far away."

He thinks for a moment. Then gasps lightly when he remembers.

"Also, there is the small plot where I built the shrine. Which is not a place we would probably live. It is relatively wooded and quite beautiful."

He smiles softly at her and his eyes drift over her form. As he looks at her, taking in her appearance and the intent of her question, he fiddles with the yin symbol.

"You may understand yourself, but we need to understand each other to find balance. I want you to know that your actions, like asking and talking about such things are already a strong active pursuit that are being received well. There is a yin and yang that exists between us in that alone."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"I think there are few places in Phoenix lands that are entirely bare of trees, but it sounds...pleasant. Is the tower the main purpose of the village?" Her hands wrap around the bowl again for its warmth, the spring flavors in sharp contrast to the day's chill. "For that matter, what is it that your parents do? I suppose it makes sense that I will know them."

Sipping at the broth, she considers. "I am not sure I seek a balance between us, but understanding, yes." Her eyes drop to her hands with a deep inhale. "Trust..somehow." The bowl thunks a bit unevenly to the table.

Her voice remains the quiet, even-toned one he's come to know. Her hands shift to her lap, tucked into their opposite sleeves. "May I comb your hair? It is calming; a thing I have done for the younger students sometimes."

[Shiba Jiro]

"As I understand it the village was created originally to facilitate the construction of the tower. It continued to exist to support it after the completion. And my parents assist with the security of the village itself rather than the mission of the tower," he explains.

His eyes seem to become lost in the thoughts surrounding the issue of trust for a bit. He doesn't really know what he can do, but there is obvious frustration and sadness in his expression. And a significant amount of self loathing weighing on his chest. "I know that it is difficult and that it is my fault. I honestly do not know what I can do, or if I can do anything. But I am entirely willing to try anything that you think might help you."

He picks at the vegetables in his soup some more. "You may comb my hair if you wish. I am glad to allow you." And if you want to pull it, cut it, or use it as leverage to smash my head against the table then you can do that too. He rises and moves to collect a comb from among his things for her. "And if having your hair combed is comforting to you I can return the favor as well. I would be glad to."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"That might be nice," she says as she takes the comb and settles behind him. Unsurprisingly, she does none of the things running through his mind. Slight fingers, still warm from holding the bowl, brush at his nape as she gathers his hair up, hands sliding down to begin with the ends. "Time...and patience." Her hands are steady, and skilled enough not to pull unnecessarily. "I have learned to work again beside the girl whose lack of control damaged my arm and hand, though it is slower work learning to handle the same aspect of the void. It feels harder to trust myself not to flinch away and lose control of such blades."

He cannot see her eyes grow distant, but her hands still for a long moment, comb midway through a lock. She is quieter as she begins again. "But...I think I have a secret of sorts to offer." The comb continues it path, the practiced motions returning to their familiar patterns. "If you would hear it."

[Shiba Jiro]

He closes his eyes at the feeling of combing. His hair was long and quite well cared for. Naturally lovely but also maintained well.

"I know. Time and patience are the only thing that will work. For you towards me. It's truly a shame that I have done what I have as well, because it is not taking me long to feel strongly towards you. When I look at you I don't only see your eyes, I see a daughters eyes, and I feel it in my heart. A need to protect and care for you as I would for her. It is so easy for me to want to be involved in every part of your life. And I have made it so difficult the other way."

Remaining still and his voice gentle. "I always will be glad to listen to your advice."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"Not that sort of secret." Her voice carries a faint hint of amusement, though it vanishes with her next words. "More the kind I think might be troublesome if known to some." She is silent a few moments, letting the smooth, repetitive motion calm her thoughts.

"I am not sure I can be protected, and I do not think I want to be...like a daughter in your heart, Jiro-san." Setting the comb on her knee, she continues combing her fingers through his hair, fingers brushing his scalp. "I do not understand how the heart shifts, what that thing is that makes it flutter and yearn for this person and not that one."

[Shiba Jiro]

"Oh, I don't think of you as a daughter. That came out wrong. I see you as the mother of our daughter, and I see her in you. Her potential and possibility. I want to do all I can to work with you and bring her into this world. And I simply know that my feelings become stronger as that moment gets closer. It will be love long before she arrives, even though it isn't at the moment." He smiles though she can't see it from behind him. It was truth to him. Short of her straight up trying to make him actively dislike her, he could see the way his feelings were flowing.

"She will be the most important thing in my heart, but before that, you already are because of her. If I thought you would welcome it, I would turn around, embrace you and kiss you. I don't and never have disliked you. You are beautiful and intelligent and interesting. I just, followed an urge that I should not have. Because I hadn't felt it with you yet, because I was impatient, because I was not smart enough to recognize that it would be better and more beautiful spending that time with you."

He chuckles lightly, looking at his hands. "I want to be with you, spend time around you, know you. Amy secret you share will help me with understanding you and getting closer I think."

[Isawa Natsuko]

"I think you're honest about that. But I also think you were honest before, even if hiding things from yourself. You have never needed to know your self in the same way I am used to, my fellow students are used to." Her hands still, and then drop to rest on his shoulders as she leans in to press her forehead against the back of his head. "So I need time to know these things are trustworthy when the previous ones were not. Time to...to see where my own heart settles. I too, have never disliked you, Jiro-san. At the least, I accept that you are my future."

"But then there is..this," she says quietly. "I met a Nekoma boy with eyes as blue as mine. He was juggling and...stole my netsuke. Then gave me the cat one. I guess the Cat remembered me, maybe?" she slips forward, letting her arms slip over his shoulders, straight ahead as she leans onto him. "I think they would...do more to guard me if they knew." It was certain that she didn't mean the Cat would guard her. And she didn't know what that kind of thing would mean for them.

[Shiba Jiro]

He listens to her, letting her words sink in and just incorporating them into his understanding. When her head presses against his, Jiro remains still and supports her weight against him, the only movement being his breathing, his shoulders slightly rising and falling under her hands.

When she moves in closer, pressing her weight onto him with her arms over his shoulders, he takes her hands, still listening. Her uninjured hand he holds firmly, but the scarred hand he moves to gently touch his lips to the old wounds, as though he hoped it might make it feel better.

When she finishes, he smiles where she can't see it, but his voice is upbeat and pleasant. "You found a connection. That's a good thing. Do you know anything about him other than a description and that he has an old Netsuke of yours? If they remember, and want to be a part of your life, and you would like that as well, I would support you in that. I have a history, as do most samurai. You should be able to know yours if that is something you want, Natsuko." There was no concern or worry, just support for her. He places her uninjured hand over his heart.