[D8 EM] Feel It In the Air

[Shiba Jiro]

Standing and looking to the middle distance, there is a palpable tension in the air.

Unable to focus on a single object and looking around in the dark, it feels like the shadows are alive, moving in his peripheral vision. Then he steps out of the shadow of a corner. It is Haru… no, something is different, he looks odd. He notices the scar on the right arm of the other figure and realizes that he is looking at himself. Looking at himself and seeing a smug expression, pronouncing to Jiro that it knows something he does not.

“You are trash. I always knew it. I’ve been watching and waiting. I’ve seen it your whole life. Selfish, destructive, and vile,” his other self booms at him.

Each word is spat at himself and sees the figure growing over him. By the end of it Jiro feels like a child in comparison, stepping away, backing up, little by little in fear. “No... “

“YES! I see it every day. You think you are better-”

Jiro interrupts himself, “No!... no... “ He begins to wilt as he thinks about it and considers that he’s right about himself.

Jiro waits for the interruption to subside and looks at Jiro with an accusing stare. “You think you are better than others. That you have some sort of moral superiority. And you proved yourself wrong. Because you are trash.”

The larger Jiro steps forward, his size affording him a quickness that the retreating Jiro cannot match. The size difference is more vast than he imagined, fitting in his own giant hand like holding a small doll.

“You hurt people. How will you explain to one that you care for another, then explain to another that you care for one? What excuses will you make? How will you shirk responsibility for your selfishness?”

Little by little as he speaks the giant hand lifts him in the air.

“I won’t…” he says, his voice small and weak, barely audible and he looks down the length of the arm which feels like it’s a mile in the sky. When had they left the room? There was an eclipse? And then it felt like he was falling faster and faster as the hand pulled him down towards the ground, but as he slammed into it he moved through it like falling into water.

Drowning! I’m drowning! Don’t!

There is no up or down, the other figure was gone, the hand missing. Jiro begins choking in water and and struggles to try and find air.

He’s right… I’m… right… I’m selfish. I’ve destroyed something before it even began. Just stop.

And he lets the water take him, fill his lungs, blackness overtaking him. Then the sound of tapping. Not normal tapping, it was slow, and long, only two of them. Louder than anything he’d ever heard, like it had been two booming sounds but had traveled through the ocean to find him.

And then two more…

His eyes opened wide and he took a deep breath in, surprised, covered in sweat and tears started to stream down his face as he stared at the ceiling.

Two taps at his door.

Cleaning up his face and readying his On, he moved to go see who it was, expecting his brother. Instead, it was a servant bearing a letter. She handed it over and he thanked her before closing the door.

He opened and read it, eyes beginning to water again. He slipped the letter into his pack among his origami paper. He cleaned himself up, moved to the central area of Phoenix rooms and knelt before the shrine there, meditating and holding back his desire to scream at the fact that his dream critic was right and he had no idea what to do other than try to clear his head.

The tension he felt in the air from his nightmare still hadn't left him.